The Only Thing Multi-Colored During The Summer Should Be A Rocket Pop
Don’t Get Caught Off Guard
BTBOB’s Online Store of Magnificence now has tank tops! Why? Because it is warming up. And a follower on Instagram made the suggestion. Yes, we totally listen.
For now, we have two options to choose from both in design and style. The Roller Skate for Juno and Defiant Key illustrations on a Unisex classic cut tank top as well as a Racerback Tank.
As an added bonus we’re going to offer a 10% off discount from now up through Memorial Day for anyone who wants to grab one of these new items and get a head start, if you have not started to do so already, on kicking the shit out of whatever tan lines (aka; The Farmer’s Tan) you may be hiding.
I was going to make a whole “Friends don’t let friends sport a Farmer’s Tan” post to go along with this announcement/post but there was no way to make it funny. I tried. Farmer’s tans are not funny.
So, let’s just play it straight this time. And keep in mind, that if you are not the sort of person who actively works on their tan during the off season and/or use sprays and lotions to toast the fuck up – or know someone who could benefit from a heads up from a friend – get a tank top. If not one of these then any other. Just start working on it. Now. Take it from a guy who has caught a glimpse in the mirror hours after the BBQ has started and realized that the whispers and smiles of friends and strangers was not because “I am the best at everything I do and or want to do and everybody adores me and wants me, especially the ladies.” It is because I took off my shirt. And yet, it seems I am still wearing one. A very white one with nipples on it.
Ok. That’s sort of funny.